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First, keep in mind that
you don't HAVE to have eye contact to go meet someone.
This is often more of a courtesy than a rule. I've
gotten women's phone numbers that never even looked my
way. However, that said, getting eye contact helps to
insure you're advance is welcome. It's part of the
mating game. If you're not bothered by rejection, don't
worry about eye contact.
Another thing to consider with eye contact is that there
are "local customs" as to how long one should make eye
contact. In Southern California , eye contact is very
fleeting - just a fraction of a second. However, in the
mid-west as in many other places in the world, eye
contact is made for a much longer period of time.
These local customs are important in determining what
eye contact is appropriate. Many men that come to Calfor.,
from the mid-west have a difficult time reading this eye
contact.
Along with eye contact you also want to use other body
language and clues as a guide. For example, when a woman
looks at you then directly away, she's probably just
scanning the landscape with you in it. On the other
hand, when she looks at you, then down and away, that's
a very good sign, regardless of the length of the
contact. Another eye contact clue is when she looks at
you out of the corner of her eye. For example, she's
sitting, talking with a girlfriend, but looks at you
(more than once) without shifting her head.
Another good sign is when she's sitting with her
shoulders square to you - something like using her
breasts to point at you. Likewise, if she's sitting in a
way to show you her palms, or touching her hair, etc.,
these are good "buying signals".
The key is to combine as many signals together as you
can. A single eye contact is not enough. Any woman
interested in meeting you will usually throw at least a
few signals. But again, you don't necessarily need any
to make an approach, just don't say I didn't warn you! |